


State of Grace

by GateOfTheSettingSun



Category: The Terror (TV 2018)
Genre: 12 Days of Carnival, Angst with a Happy Ending, Denial of Feelings, Edward is gay but he tries to hide it and fails, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Jopson is an angel, M/M, Self-Denial
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-05-02
Packaged: 2021-03-02 09:55:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23969443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GateOfTheSettingSun/pseuds/GateOfTheSettingSun
Summary: Some Little/Jopson <312 Days of CarnivalDay 2 (Dec 14): “state of grace”
Relationships: Thomas Jopson/Lt Edward Little
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	State of Grace

Over the course of time, they had spent here on the ice Edward was becoming convinced that Jopson was godsent. The Captain’s steward had caught the lieutenants’ eyes before. He had noticed him at the beginning of their journey. Recognized him as a dutiful steward and a hard worker. Anyone who might think that the stewards had easy jobs was gravely mistaken. Edward had even admitted to himself that he was attracted to the steward. Not that it was something that he was planning to act on. It was not acceptable in any way. Pleasant to look at, that was all Edward could allow himself.

But as the ice trapped them and the dark hours of winter closed in on them, Edward started to see something completely else. In his worst moments, when the darkness closed in on him, the steward was as a beacon. Ever kind the steward would take the time to ask if Edward was well, despite having enough to take care of. He looked at Edward like he was someone. Someone other than a higher ranking lieutenant on the ship. Like he was something more than that. The clear blue eyes held actual worry for Edward, as a person.

Those beautiful clear blue eyes. Edward would only describe them as angelic which was often how he saw Jopson. In a sleep-deprived state, he had been overwhelming convinced that Thomas Jopson had to be, indeed, an angel. Edward didn’t remember if there was any verse in the bible that described what angels were supposed to look like nor how they were supposed to act. But if anyone requested him to describe an angel he could easily name certain traits. Kind, giving, beautiful, guiding and bright. Words he just as easily could label on Jopson.

Edward was sure that the steward was utterly unaware of what part he played for Edward here in the darkness. The room grew brighter and warmer as the steward entered, at least to Edward. A sense of calmness always washed over the lieutenant, as if now that the steward was here things couldn’t go truly wrong. All that he gave, all that he did would guide them towards the light, towards home. Edward was sure of this, even if the ice didn’t crack as Jopson continued to take care of Terror’s captain.

Edward felt as if things were spiraling, it was like a constant headache, this darkness he couldn’t get rid of. He should be able to handle more, he had to lead and order the crew when the captain could not. He should be stronger than this. As it was all closing in, his eyes would seek Jopson. And now he couldn’t help himself. His eyes always lingered. Followed the light the other emitted.

At first the had been ashamed. There had been this horrible feeling of corrupting something so pure and untouched. As if he couldn’t trust his own creature, like the demons that haunted him would tempt him to do something truly cruel towards the last person he wished to ever harm. So he drew away from the steward who grew increasingly worried for him. Guess the lines under his eyes had grown so deep and dark that there was no hiding the battle he was fighting within himself. He wanted to warn Jopson to stay away. Yet he wished for nothing else than to have the steward fall into his arms. He wanted to be rid of this darkness. And as Jopson’s hands stroke his hair back in such a gentle manner it was as Edward’s soul was cleansed and his mind filled with such graceful light.


End file.
